Friday, May 6

irreverance

its Friday night, and i just painted my nails a hot coral colour last nite...and what's a 24 year old girl living in KL to do...?

i don't know about you, but of course, i am hiding at home, as per usual...

so what else is there to do, but peruse Facebook and have my share of semi-stalking behaviour, and I come across some pages & pictures of my ex-colleagues. I am instantly hit with a pang of nostalgia, which slowly churns my insides and the bile rises...as, I realise, I have lost it all...
My seemingly endless year of job-searching, enduring frightening dips of self-esteem, and hapless meandering through the streets that I virtuallymemorised...they have all amounted to this point in my life, where I am stuck in a limbo of W A I T I N G, once again.

It feels like I just don't belong. Neither here nor there. It seems, I have missed my boat in Malaysia now I am no longer a freshie graduate. And, it seems my heart starts to break, everytime I think back to my life in Melbourne a couple of months ago...My bile starts to rise, and I choke back the wave of bitterness and disappointment that threatens to overwhelm me.
Maybe, I am going about this the wrong way...perhaps I shouldn't look back, and just let bygones be bygones.

In the words that John Lennon once sang; Let it be, Let it be...

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